Take a Train to the 1990 Yankees

A friend posted this story about a chance to ride a vintage train to Yankee stadium for opening day.

The jokes write themselves.

Does the train come pre-graffitied? Will there be homeless men, bag ladies? Can we expect a mugging?

Ahhhhh....Abe Beam's New York.

We are reminded of a Yankees game our father took us to in 1990. This was in the era when the team collapsed and was truly terrible, the pre Jeter and Torre days. Starter Eric Plunk gave up several runs in the opening innings. Sitting along the first base line we shouted, 'Hey Plunk! You suck!' To which our father replied, 'Thank you for that editorial comment.'

Sitting to our front was a pair of Japanese businessmen taking in an American baseboro game. On our left were some German tourists (talk about jokes writing themselves) and on the right were a gaggle of drunk Puerto Ricans.

Anyway the Yankees lost.

Driving out of the South Bronx our dad took a wrong turn. As we went through a tunnel he locked the doors, rolled up the windows and said, 'Don't look at anyone.'

We emerged from the tunnel and were accosted by a squigee-man, demanding we pay him a dollar for wiping our windshield. Decorum prevents us from describing what happened next. Needless to say, Rudy Giuliani couldn't become mayor fast enough.