Chindian Delight

I live in Chindia.

Yesterday we were at a pool party where most of the families were from India. As our various kids played and we mingled it was interesting listening to the inside conversation. We got to talking about family.

Like most Americans who've been here for a few generations my family has no contact with relatives overseas. Not that there are many of those. Most of the Stroocks outside of America were killed in the holocaust.

Of course this is not the case with our Indian friends. They had a lot of interesting laments about living here and having family over there. For starters when they visit India our friends need to go for 2-3 weeks. This sucks up all their vacation time. Once in India their relatives lament that they're only staying for a few weeks. Several days are needed just to recover from the jet lag, which is severe. Then there is no time to rest as family takes one around town, the state, and country proudly showing off they're American family. One of the side effects is weight gain. Every home is expected to provide ample meals for visitors. It sounds like a grand tour-smorgasbord.

Which is fine as we looooove Indian food.

There is also cost. A trip for a family of four will run at least $10,000, tickets and shopping. India, they say, is very expensive.

There is also the issue of family pressure. All Indian grandparents need reassuring that their grandchildren are being raised properly. This includes adherence to caste, but also learning the language. Most of the families in attendance yesterday were passing on the native tongue, but a few weren't. This is a source of trouble. Said grandparents can also nag about their grandchildren's loss of Indian identity. Many Indian families here put up Dewali lights. Of course, often they stay up right past Christmas. Many grandparents in India are horrified by Halloween:

'Children dress up in scary costumes, go door to door and demand candy from strangers? This is normal in America?...'