Draped in Black on Independence Day

As an alt history author I love these arguments:

This July 4th, I'm celebrating by taking a plane from the US to the United Kingdom. The timing wasn't intentional, but I embrace the symbolism. American independence in 1776 was a monumental mistake. We should be mourning the fact that we left the United Kingdom, not cheering it.

Look, let's not take this too seriously, this is a Vox article after all; still....

The author sites three reasons why we should mourn America's victory in the Revolution, slavery,  Indians and a preference for the Parliamentary system. Let's take the last point first. The author writes,

In the UK, the Conservative government decided it wanted a carbon tax. So there was a carbon tax. Just like that. Passing big, necessary legislation — in this case, legislation that's literally necessary to save the planet — is a whole lot easier with parliaments than presidential systems.

Its hard to pass things he likes in our system, I grant him that. He also sites Wyoming holding the same power as California in the Senate. True, but not in the House. Why not site Vermont vs. Texas? For that matter, in the above quote let's replace 'carbon tax' with 'flat tax'. There we go. Its all making a sense now. See, in this system its hard for people like me to get what they want too. That's the point, dingus.

As far as treatment of Native Americans, has the man read any history? Is he not familiar with the history of the British in Australia? Or their numerous colonial wars in Africa? Or the Sepoy Mutiny? Up north, the Canadians have turned apologizing and appeasing their 'First Nation's' into a national sport behind Hockey and Curling. So no.

The slavery thing is kind of interesting. Parliament banned slavery in 1833 and the slave trade in 1807. Maybe. But I dunno. Thirty years later the slave states rebelled against the United States, why wouldn't they have rebelled against Britain in 1833? They would have, and many of the northern colonies would no doubt have joined in.

That's ok, I'm an Anglophile myself and love Britain and the empire. And this idea about America staying in the empire has been written about before.

The author isn't the only one to regret American independence. Into the 1830's, every July 4th  little old Tory ladies in New York City draped their windows in black.
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