Will Writes a Miniseries

With the release of Midway, I've be wracking my brain about how to do a movie blockbuster about the Battle of the Bulge. Lord knows we need one. The original movie was so bad, Ike publicly disavowed it.

But why not do a mini-series, Chernobyl style? We are in the anniversary of the battle. Say five episodes? 

How about an episode about St. Vith? Another covering the British 1st Armoured Division. The nuns of Bastogne.Something about the Krauts, wankers. The weatherman of SCHAEFF.  And can we have a realistic portrayal of Patton, please?  Not that crap George C. Scott gave us.

Submit episode ideas below.

What Will's Watching

The Battle of the Bulge (please): Seventy-Five years after the Bulge, we desperately need a new movie about it. The original was so bad it was publicly disavowed by Ike. Band of Brothers had an episode about the 101st in the bulge. Battleground is probably the best movie about the battle. Exit question: a grand sweep of a film or say, a limited, series with each episode featuring a different plot line?

World War Two Bad Movie Bugaloo

The other day this blog's Confederate Contingent noted that 2001's catastrophic Pearl Harbor should never have been made. Man, oh man, is that ever true. Not even Kate Beckinsale in one of those 1940's era bikini thingies makes that film watchable, and we don't say that lightly.

This blog has noted before that Battle of the Bulge is a piece of crap. Eisenhower hated it so much he issued a statement disavowing the film.

Don't kid yourself, folks. When you say Saving Private Ryan is great, you mean the blockbuster opening scene. The rest of that film is a dystopian nightmare made by a Baby Boomer who thinks time began with the Baby Boomers. Saving Private Ryan is a WWII film about WWII films. 

We came away from The Thin Red Line thinking, What the fuck was that? We remain baffled by Terrance Mallick's reputation. However we haven't seen The Thin Red Line since, perhaps it has aged well with time?

Speaking of aging, how about those late 60's WWII films? One watches Kelly's Heroes and thinks, Man, it's 1970. We love Kelly's Heroes. The Bridge at Remagan is another bit of the late 60's. Great opener, though. Das Boot has a great opener too, but doesn't look like 1981. Heh, John Wayne's In Harm's Way screams, 'It's 1964!' lots of babes, though, so we'll forgive him. 

What are the worst WWII movies?