Debate This!

Look, folks, I didn't watch, OK. I haven't watched one of these things since 2004. Why do that to myself?

Also, I was flat on my back with gout, so I got that going for me, you know, which is nice.

Here is what I can tell you about American debates.

We all remember Michael Dukakis' great policy ideas in the '88 debates, and Dan Quayle really showing how he was ready to lead that same year. Hey, I loved how Algore buried W under a barrage of facts and policy proscriptions. Remember how Jean Francois Kerry showed how he could lead on the international stage in 2004?

I kid, I kid, but that's my point.

Here's what everyone remembers about the '88 debate:

And Quayle in '88:

Algore in 2000:

And Jean Francois Kerry (A-Hole, MA)

All I could find was this ad.

Jesus Christ, Algore, 'What about Dingle-Norwood?' and this man was almost president. Dingle-Norwood, who gives a crap?!

My own sense is that last night's debate will be remembered for Lester Holt being Hillary!'s lick-spittle. Too bad, I always liked Holt. Mr. Trump's people will no doubt take some clips from last night and cut ads with them, showing Mr. Trump looking composed and presidential.

So unless Mr. Trump pulled off his pants and slapped his dick down on the podium, and I say, why not? He probably won.