Saturday, June 30, 2018

Vice's Nicole Clark is Too Stupid to be Asian*

Nicole Clark of Vice is too stupid to be Asian.

Just read her horrible misinterpretation of The Simpsons.

Ms. Clark just doesn't get the show. Personally we thought The Simpson's headed south in the mid-90s and bottomed out about 1999. We haven't watched since.

Ms. Clark find several things about The Simpsons to be problematic.

really doesn't like the way Marge Simpson is treated, 'I don’t understand why she doesn’t just divorce Homer’s dumb ass.'  Ms. Clarke has noticed that Marge is abused and neglected by Homer, Bart, Lisa, and everyone around her. That's the whole point of Marge, and you're a dumbass, Ms. Clark.

Ms. Clark also writes, 'But my dislike of [The Simpsons] extends beyond the sitcom format. You might as well call me Frank Grimes, because I absolutely hate Homer, and couldn’t stand watching the show mostly due to his character. I don’t find him funny or likable—he’s an insufferable, pathetic freeloader.'

For those who may not recall, Frank Grimes is the hardworking nuclear plant employee who owes everything he has to grit and moxy. He's the opposite of Homer. In this sense Ms. Clark is exactly right - Frank Grimes is a good guy - but she is also totally wrong. You're not supposed to find Homer funny or likable. We all know he's an insufferable, pathetic freeloader, Ms. Clark.

Ms. Clark goes on to project her racial insecurities on to The Simpsons, 'Asians also get weirdly-drawn faces in the show, though other characters simply get to have the same face styles in different skin tones. I don’t really know how to think about it beyond recognizing that the white folks in Springfield are already yellow, so the show had to sub in some other racial "features" to indicate Asian characters.' 

Oh honey, there's really nothing we can do to help you with your cultural hang-ups. It must be difficult to be thought both smart and sexually exotic. How do you bear it? By the way Ms. Clark opens by noting her parents weren't fans of animated television. Is anyone really surprised?

After bashing The Simpsons Ms. Clark then points out all the great things about the show, satire, cameos, 'meta-humor'. Ok, we take it back. Ms. Clark isn't stupid. She's confused. Ms. Clark is super 'woke' but her 'wokeness' just won't allow her to enjoy The Simpsons like a normal human. Feminism is always bad for women. Look what it's done to poor Ms. Clark.

*C'mon, people, do we really have to have this argument? Fine. Here's an article from 2013 about how Asian countries dominate international tests.


  1. "We're not supposed to find Homer funny."

    Are you sure that she's the stupid one?

  2. Thanks for stopping by, Nicole. You are right about The Expanse, though.