Saturday Updates

Blood, Frogs, Lice, Wild Animals, Cattle Disease, Boils, Hail, Locusts, Darkness, Death of the First Born...One dips a finger in red wine and touches a plate with each plague. Never ceases to give me chills. The recitation of plagues sounds even cooler in the original Hebrew*, like you can actually feel God smiting the Egyptians. When the Israelis launched their final offensive against Egypt in 1948, they called it Operation Ten Plagues. The Jews have a knack for really cool sounding operational code names. As the Imams say...

A fine, and shockingly fast Seder last night. Those dishes didn't wash themselves. We have a couple of teenagers in the family now, and per tradition they're allowed wine on Passover. Between that and the post-dinner sweets, the teens got a little punchy. We sent them away.

This is post 4902. According to calculations made by the Stroock families' crack mathematics team, at the current pace post 5,000 will be made on 24 July. You people know what happens then.

On to the things.

A frustrating and disappointing week working on The New American Order. The novel's opening chapter takes place at The Greenbrier in White Sulphur Springs, West Virginia. Here the president will be sworn in for his second term and give his inauguration address. The three scenes we want to write are written, but we have not written the fourth and concluding scene we wanted to write. In fact, we don't know what we want to write because we're not sure how to transmit the president's four points without showing a speech. We don't want to show a speech.

That being said we made a lot of progress on TNAO this week, writing, re-writing, and adding to scenes, packing those scenes with more info and detail.  

We think TNAO's foreign plot will be about India, Pakistan, and the Commonwealth leading to Will's Good Idea for the Week of 4/16/22, which we'll write about tomorrow. You people know where this is headed. 

The question arises, do we want to write several novels in the universe? We know we're writing three. In fact, we sent The Great Salvation of 1976 to the editor this week. And we have a fifth idea for a novel. It all depends on sales. As of this morning 75 is still in the top 25 of its Amazon category. In theory this post-nuclear universe could be as big as the World War 1990 universe...

...Speaking of...people still have World War 1990: The Weser. More people will have it next week.

*Even cooler in Klingon, no?

Passover Tidings and Jewish Things

Passover greetings, reader(s) of Stroock's Books. Tonight we'll do the traditional Stroock family Seder. Actually it's only been traditional for the last 25 years or so, since this Stroock married a pretty girl from Delaware who comes from Conservative Judaism with a mother who spent her summers in a Modern Orthodox Synagogue in the South Bronx (now an AME Baptist church, but the Hebrew lettering is above the Grand Concourse entrance). 

Let's not take religion too far. Mrs. Stroock's 76rs are playing tomorrow at six and we'll be having an early second Seder to accommodate. 

This is the first family Seder we've had since Covid. Our late grandfather could get through a Seder in an hour and fifteen minutes, timed. Anyway, the modern Stroock Seder is about two and half hours with dinner in the middle and games at the end.

The woman folk do all the prep. We get dish duty when it's all over. Everything is as it should be.

Here's the Italian Sebastian Maniscalco with the best Gentile take on a Passover Seder:

Do not, repeat, do not, EVER, try the gefilte fish. You've been warned. Will post a few picks. 

We put off blogging till the afternoon to shake up our schedule and unleash some ju-ju. Mission partially accomplished. Will report more tomorrow.

With Israel and Charleton Heston in mind [You're still doing Charleton Heston Passover jokes?-Ed] The Time's of Israel reports: 'The Defense Ministry revealed Thursday that a laser air defense system it is developing successfully shot down drones, rockets, mortars, and anti-tank missiles in a first series of tests last month. According to the head of the ministry’s research and development team, Brig. Gen. (res.) Yaniv Rotem, the tests were conducted at “challenging” ranges and timings. “The use of a laser is a ‘game changer’ and the technology is simple to operate and proves to be economically viable,” he said.' Zzzzzap! Economics. Remember those Iron Dome missiles cost thousands of dollars each. Think of what this means for the strategic calculous. They really do have lasers! The Imams are right. The Jew is clever. 

The Jerusalem Post has a short retrospective on the Second Intifada. Bloody March 2002, when 131 Israelis were murdered by terrorists, (Do the math. It was Israeli 9/11) and the Passover Massacre which saw 30 + killed at a Seder. The Israelis had had enough. You could tell the Israelis were about to rain destruction upon on the PLO because they went radio silent. The Sharon government (greatest Jew since Joshua) moved from talk to...resolve. Oh shit, we said.

Below, your Friday flag, as it were:

It was either this or Omega Man.

Anti-Asian Hate Crime Week: The Chindian Experience

There are idiots who think yesterday's Simpsons/Ganesh clip is racist. Did we mention these people are idiots? The whole point is that Homer understands life and the universe through TV, and naturally assumed the 'natives' will be terrified by Ganesh. Instead they are confused, annoyed, and in one case outraged. Homer is later chased up a tree. The best line is when the mother-in-law says, 'Ganesh has been subdued.' In watching this clip, those who may not know pick up just a little bit of Indian culture. See how that works? My friend and neighbor Sourabh Mukherji thinks the clip is funny.

The Bridgewater/Raritan school district superintendent is Dr. Thomas Ficarra.  He refuses to do the right thing and fully open the schools. Yesterday the board announced that if your in-person child is home sick, they will not be able to attend school virtually. The point of this rule of what? Dr. Thomas Ficarra, despite all that education (did you know he's a 'doctor'), refuses to think for himself and simply tells us over and over again, we're following state and CDC guidelines. What's the point of all that education if you sit at your desk and wait for the CDC to tell you what to do? Dr. Thomas Ficarra is worried about his liability and terrified of the unions. He'a coward.

Tonight's the first night of Passover, the most important holiday in Judaism. As Mrs. Stroock is still in Indiana caring for a relative we don't know what, if anything we'll do tonight. We're thinking we'll just gather the girls, answer the four questions and maybe read the plagues. One by one you dip a finger in red whine, dab it on a plate and recite:

1. Blood. (Dam)
2. Frogs (Tsifardeah)
3. Lice (Kinim)
4. Gnats and flies (Arov)
5. Disease on livestock (Dever)
6. Unhealable boils (Shkhin)
7. Hail and thunder (Barad)
8. Locusts (Arbeh)
9. Darkness (Choshech)
10. Death of the first-born of all humans and animals. (Makat b’chorot)

Say it in Hebrew and you'll get chills. When the Israelis give their military operations biblical names, you know they're bringing some serious pain. Remember the fate awaiting all enemies of the Jews. Hate us all you want. In a thousand years your civilization will be picked over by archeologists, and we'll still be here. 

Speaking of, it seems the Israelis are deadlocked again. Bibi's real genius is picking rival Likudniks, making enemies of them, and dividing them accordingly. At the moment none of those enemies could agree on who gets to be PM. Maybe a rotational thing, but who knows?

Below, the Friday Flag:

Passover: The Final Seder

That's our wedding chuppah (canopy) sewn by Mrs. Stroock's mother, for whom our oldest is named, now the Stroock Passover tablecloth. It was 20 years ago that we hosted our first Passover for the family, we'd only get to do so two more times as our mother-in-law died in 2002. We like to think it will be an heirloom in 2098.

Dispatches from a Truncated Seder

No relatives this year, just us.

Turns out we picked a horrid Kosher for Passover wine, an Israeli Merlot... 

[Dear god-Ed]

As rabbinical organizations across the Jewish world are saying 'do what you gotta do' this year, we set that Israeli Merlot aside and uncorked the Cavaleire D'Oro Chinati. What you gonna do about it g...Boom...CRACK, arghhhhh!

The Seder was short this year, almost Stroockian. Our grandfather could burn through one in an hour and fifteen minutes, and that's if he wasn't focusing. Speaking of:

The Kiddish cup of our great-great grandfather, Jacob Loeb (b. 1869) passed down from our late grandfather to us. We visited his grave in Philadelphia a few years ago:

Papa Loeb, as he is known, was an investment banker who lost half his money on Black Tuesday but survived with his name intact.

Our grandfather's parents divorced when he was a kid. Actually, his father more or less ran out on the family (our GF never blamed him BTW, and said his mother was a total nightmare) Papa Loeb, took a hand in raising him. Every Sunday in the 30's Papa Loeb took our grandfather to the George Washington Bridge construction site, and from there, lunch at the Algonquin. 

We have Papa Loeb and Grandma Carrie's living room furniture (given as a wedding present in 1894)  at the house in the Stroock Northern Strategic Direction.

I have Returned Masalla...oops.

...Sorry. Pharaoh, let my people go!

Happy Charlton Heston Day everyone! The Oldest Daughter was once heard to say, 'But you said Aerial Sharon is the greatest Jew since Charlton Heston!' Indeed and since Moses.

One year the Stroocklette's Hindu friends were watching the Exodus chapter of Netflix's excellent The Bible. One of them remarked, 'Wow! Your god is powerful!' He favorite god is Ganesh. 

Zzzzzzz....crack, BANG!

Ha-ha, the lightening bolt missed and...ZAP! Ouch!

Normally we have Mrs. Stroock's sister and her brood over and we head a table of seven women, but not this year. The Stroocklettes will be helping their mother prepare for our toned down Pass Over.

Will post a pic or two.

Monday Hine Ma Tov

After the Raid on Entebbe Hine Ma Tov we saw several different versions of the hymn, including a boys choir from Miami. We'd love to see what the Harlem Boys Choir or any AME choir could do with Hine Ma Tov.

We did find this from 1960:

That is the spirit of 1948, as they say in Israel. This is the Israel of the Kibbutzim, of Ben Gurion, of the Palmach. 

Passing Over

The second Seder is over and the week of Passover has begun.

The Passover Seder commemorates Exodus but doesn't really recount it. 

Rather the Passover Seder is about duty and memory, the duty to remember and commemorate and personalize. Jews are commanded by the Passover Haggadah to say 'we'. We came out of Egypt. We smeared blood on our door, etc.

In this way Passover isn't a distant event but the central event to Jewish existence.

Tuesday Tally: More Talmudic Commentary

The five worst things about Passover:

Manischewitz: What is this 'wine'. It tastes either like stale wine spiked with Sweat and Low or grape juice spiked with fermented wine. Who thought this up and who thought it was a good idea? Sadly it is now a kind of unholy Passover tradition for American Hebrews. We cant speak for Israelis. *

Gefilta Fish: Made from cod and whatever they could scrape off the bottom of the boat. Just a rolled up ball of fish. Jesus, people. We can do better than this!

Elijah: In Casa de Stroock Elijah's arrival leads to a mass scramble from the dinning room in a race to open the door.  Last year we closed it on Elijah's foot. In previous years the cat has escaped. Thanks to a particularly virulent intestinal cancer we no longer have the later problem.

In-laws: No explanation required. Sadly, my own mother-in-law is fifteen years dead, but we dine on the table cloth she made for our wedding hoopa.

Culture Clash: In Familia de Stroock Passover was a solemn event requiring a coat and tie. In my wife's family it was more casual, like jeans and T-shirts with haggadahs courtesy of Maxwell House. God I was horrified at our first combined-joint Passover. Guess whose version won out? **

[oh don't be such a standoffish prick. You're grandfather could blow through the entire Seder in an hour and fifteen minutes-ed]

*Australia makes a fine kosher for Passover wine. Perhaps related, the commander of the Australian Expeditionary Force in the Great War was Jewish, General Sir John Monash. This is why the Israeli commando attached to the SAS in Operation Eastern Storm is code-named MONASH.

**One year, during the four questions, they actually called my wife's younger sister, then in Hawaii, so she could ask them.

***We also use my great grandfather's bris cup (1868). he would not have approved of my marriage. You see, we come from respectable Western (German) European Jewry, while my wife is descended from Eastern European (Lithuania) peasant stock. My great grandfather would stand at the door of the The Temple Emanuel Synagogue on 61st st. and ask the young girl's the names of their dates. If the name was Eastern European he wouldn't let them in.

****Further irony, my wife's mother's maiden name was Applebaum, which means while Lithuanian, they were actually descended from Jews that came to the country with the  Teutonic Knights, you know, Krauts.