Trumpzilla

Well that's was interesting.

Between Mr. Trump finally getting his feet under him, Hillary!'s 'deplorable' remark, and her syphilis induced neurological health crisis, Mr. Trump has surged.

Just this morning we learn that he is +6 in the LA Times Poll, ahead in Fl, OH, NV, IA...

But let us backtrack.

There is a line of thinking that Hillary!'s deplorables remark is actually working for her, driving a wedge in the Trump camp. Please. It has totally backfired. It took them, what 36 hours to produced a great ad with the remark. You'd have to be sipping martinis on the banks of the Potomac while a Mexican waiter brings you champagne, caviar and fa-goi (I'm not bothering with the spelling) to believe that. You'd have to be Jennifer Rubin. Jesus wept, and I used to read her everyday.

Insulting half the electorate is NEVER a good idea.

But let us not kid ourselves. On part of Mr. Trump's rise is due to Hillary! being the worst person ever. The man has run a great campaign the last three weeks or so. The Mexico trip, his Michigan visit yesterday, this paid leave idea...even before the weekend he was closing in.

I don't know why anyone is surprised. He sliced through the GOP's best candidates with ease. Bush, Rubio, Cruz, Kasich...today Mr. Trump drinks the classiest champagne from their political skulls.

Now two weeks ago the word was Hillary was going to run out the clock. In the American NFL we call this the prevent defense. The idea is that the defense drops back, gives up small plays so it can stop the big ones. This never works, but there's no dissuading NFL coaches from this strategy. The prevent defense prevents you from winning. Foreign readers should look up 'John Elway + The Drive' to see what I mean.

Now she can't do that. She has to come out, be active, shake things up. The problem is she can't do that. She's a physical wreck suffering from some sort of neurological disorder, post concussion syndrome and syphilis. Independent of all this Hillary! has just not aged well. Not all of us do. My father-in-law is 70 and wheel chair bound. When my grandfather was 70 my sister and I could pass for his children. Such is the genetic lottery.

The thinking also was that Hillary! could make Mr. Trump screw up in the debates. Again, the man has utterly annihilated well thought of, seasoned politicians in 20 debates. Does anyone think he's really going to be rattled in debate # 21?

Hillary! needs to come up with some ideas, but she can't do that. Hillary! doesn't have ideas, other than Hillary!

Hillary! needs to attack Trump, but what can she say about him that isn't also true of Hillary!? What, he treats women badly? Oh I know, shady business dealings! How 'bout his foreign policy ideas? Yeah, Hillary really wants to have a debate on Iraq, Syria, Libya....what difference does it make?

Look folks, I'm a Rubio man. I hold no truck with Mr. Trump. But Mr. Trump has tapped into something. Coupled with the fact that Hillary! is the worst person in the world, heck, he's in great shape.

I wonder how Melania will decorate the White House.

Replacing the Pneumatic Epileptic

Rumor has it that the Democrat National Committee is having a super-double secret meeting to talk about potentially replacing Hillary!

This is patently ridiculous. As if the Clintons would relinquish their grip on the Democrat Party for a such a thing to happen.

You don't run a brazen money laundering operation of the breadth, scale  and brazenness of the Clinton Foundation only to step aside because its unlikely you'll reach the end of your term in office. Can't you people see that we owe this to Hillary!?

That said, this is a fun intellectual exercise, so let's try to play this out.

Who replaces Hillary!?

Let's start with the obvious-

-Tim Kaine: Though the #2 man on the ticket, Senator Kaine DQs for being a white, heterosexual male.

-Joe Biden: Also DQs.

-Elizabeth Warren: A woman from a NE state who also checks the Native American box on the affirmative action form as she pretends to be Cherokee. Personally I'm hoping for this one, only so I can meet her and say, 'Me white man, trade big wompum.'

-Bernie Sanders: DQs as well. Sorry, but the Democrat Party of 2016 is not going to nominate al-yahud, no matter how much he loves Stalin and Mao.

Gavin Newsom: Mayor of SF. Gay and loving it! Hampered though by being a white male. He is from San Francisco. Being that most male Dems are too, this helps him.

Less obvious-

Andrew Cuomo: Gov of NY and a Clinton man: Seems competent. He's getting the new Tappan Zee Bridge built, which stuns the hell out of me. [Why doesn't he DQ? -ed]. AC doesn't DQ because Italians ain't white. Too bad, really. I voted for his daddy and I might actually vote him. This would also give us an excuse to dig out our old Vote for Cuomo, he's no homo! bumper stickers. Sorry, you're just going to have to google that one.

Bill Richardson: Another Clinton man, mostly did their bidding. Can check the all important 'Chicano' box on the affirmative action form. Endorsed Barry in '08 so its hard to think the Clintons would forgive something like that. Also, he's a complete fucking moron. I mean, back in Mexico he'd be selling trinkets to rich Americans in Cabo.

Deval Patrick: Two term governor of MA. Black. Possible, but the feminist killjoys (I know, is there any other kind?) would scream that its their turn.

Way out there-

Chelsea!: Oh hell, why not? She's 36, just think of the bio. Stepping in for old and inform mom, braving the campaign with two young children at her ($10 million) home. Don't let the fact that she has no experience and no policy chops whatsoever put you off. When did the Democrat Party ever care about THAT?